It did take a lousy Tuesday to bring out the ‘protectionist’ in him or it did take a lousy Tuesday for me to understand a computer salesman was more than one? This lousy Tuesday began like most other days, packed with the usual things most of us in the ‘working class’ do for a living. A couple of meetings, a few brain storming sessions on how to improve this and that… mostly that, which included, scheming plans on how go one up on colleagues and other devious ways of manipulating people into thinking your way.
Anyways, a meeting of the morning seemed to go on and on, forever. After a point in time, which was about 28 minutes into the conversation, it all seemed as if two out of the three men sitting on the other side were suffering from verbal diarrhoea. Everything they said was so loose and insipid that it didn’t hold water, or was it only that. Putting up with that was one hell of a task. Naturally, things got delayed and most of all, lunch was delayed. That caused a lot of burden on the thinking process, as an already stretched system was now working overtime to compensate for the wants of a modern day working class professional.
Post lunch, post the scheming, post the bitching, post the posting on my favourite social network I realised my ‘brand new’ laptop, only about a couple of weeks old was persisting with its non-cooperative movement, by making sure the most crucial part of my interface with it, the track pad, acted in a manner that could easily be described as non cooperative. The cursor would get stuck at all the wrong places, at the most inopportune moment creating what in these days is popularly called, #awkwardmoment. Believe me; I have had plenty in the past couple of weeks.
I went down to remind my IT Manager about the issue. Since I had already told him several times about my frustration with the silly track pad, I was now a little upset because no service person had come in to take a look at it. When he expressed his inability to get the service person over, I said I will throw my weight around a little and make sure he lands up in the office, ASAP! I dialled his number; he was not reachable. I dialled his number again and again, he was not reachable! I could see Murphy ROFL in the corner of my eye. This infuriated me even further, as a ‘conspiracy theory’ flashed through like ‘Breaking News’ across my over burdened synaptic pathway. Could it be an ‘inside job’ where somebody told him about my call and he ran to the basement to cut off any chance of connecting with him?
Not the one to give up, I quickly picked up a landline dialled his number again. Connected! #Awkwardmoment number? Don’t know, don’t care! Nevertheless, this is when I was to be enlightened about this new avatar of our friendly computer salesman. The moment the phone connected, I ranted furiously as to why nobody was there to check on my ‘bloody’ system. My childhood Anglo-Indian influence was beginning to show. Abruptly, I was cut off by the salesman, saying what did you just say Saar? I was taken aback momentarily; I thought he didn’t understand so I repeated myself again, “Why isn’t anybody here to check on my ‘bleedy’ system? Hoping a little more of the local accent would perhaps, make him understand the seriousness of the situation. What he told me after that came as a big surprise, to say the least!
He actually said, “Saar, don’t call yany systems yany names, please! What do you think, if you have a dog, will you allow yanybody to call it bleddy dog? Tell tell, I was dumbstruck! Here was a champion of a system! A system of the down! Another flash appears on my hapless brain cells which read, “Democracy isn’t a great thing”. This was followed by images of thousands of abused computers, laptops, tablets, even some smart phones taking out a morcha led by this ‘topi clad’ laptop salesman holding a placard which read ‘Prashant Murdabad’ hurried through my mind. I slammed the phone, looked up and saw complete shock and surprise on my colleagues’ faces who apparently had been privy to my conversation with the salesman.
As expected, the evening went quiet, mostly because I never ever recovered from that conversation and decided not to say anything against anybody, or anything!
*Red Herring – No keys on the keypad, no extra charging of batteries, no excess use of the monitor or computing power or for that matter nothing in excess on this computer was ever used in writing this article.